


Why does it have to end like this?

by idk123kl



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-28
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-10-25 01:37:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10754034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idk123kl/pseuds/idk123kl





	1. Chapter 1

It has never gotten this bad before. Yea, my parents yell at me to the point where I want to cry, but they had never told me they wished I did not exist. They never hit me before, either. And that hurt. I didn't know what to do. I felt stuck and confused. So I just went into my room. The room, for the son they did not want. Me, lance. I was not supposed to be here. Alive. No, being alive was wrong in my parents' eyes. I grabbed a bag of clothes and walked right out of the house. I frantically called up Hunk, my friend.

"Hey Hunk, it's Lance. Do you mind if I come over?" Asked Lance breathed softly waiting for the answer.

"Oh, hey Lance. I think it's a bit too late to come over," replied Hunk.

" Yea, you're right. Sorry to bug you. Bye"

"Wai-" Lance hung up before Hunk could finish his sentence.

I walked around, unknowingly where to go. I ended up in this park near the hospital my sister is staying in. I could just walk into the street. Surprisingly, even though it is late, the streets are still busy around here. In the corner of my eye, there is a pair of headlights too close into the park.

"Lance, buddy are you here?" Hunk yelled out.

" How did you find me?" I asked, walking over to him.

"Oh, yeah. Your parents called me. They thought you would be at the park near where your sister is." He pulled me into a hug. I freeze, unable to hug him back. We walked back to his car.

"You don't have to talk. Just listen, or sleep or like nod your head, or something. You're sleeping over at my house. " He paused and waited for me to do something like to show I was listening. I nodded my head.

He continued, "You don't have to tell me what happened now, but when you want to talk, I am here. Don't you forget that." I nodded again. The drive to his house was quiet. We got to his house, and I couldn't move. I couldn't speak.

"Lance! Lance! Stay with me, Lance." Hunk yelled in my ear.

"What happened?" I guessed I had a confused look on my face.

"Oh, well we just got here, and I was asking if you want me to make you something to eat?"

"No, I'm good. Thanks though." I got out of the car. Hunk followed. We went into his room.

"Hunk."

"Yes."

"I was supposed to take my little sister to the hospital after school, but I needed to go work instead. I had lost the money that was for the rent, I had to work." He looked up at me and I continued. "You know how there's always loud music playing and everyone is outside?" He nodded his head.

"Well, the music was still playing, but there was no one outside. That got me worried. I ran inside. And when I got to her room she wasn't there. I turned around, and my mom was there. She told me to go downstairs. So, I went and like, yeah. They started yelling at me; saying how I can't do things right, that I mess up too much, I have to start thinking more towards the family instead of myself and shit. And then, they asked for the money. The look on their faces when I said I had lost the money. Hunk. It was so bad. They looked at me with utter disappointment. Like they didn't want me anymore. And that's when my dad hits me and said ' _i wish you were never born_.' Hunk, that hurt. You could actually see the regret in his eyes after he said that. So I just went into my room and ran out." 

"Why were you at that park? 

"Across the street was where my sister was at the night all alone, and that was the park I would normally take her sometimes after school." 

"I need you to answer me and be honest too. " He looked at me, with tears in his eyes ready to fall. "Were you thinking of walking into the middle of the street?"

I couldn't answer. My lips moved but nothing came out. I just shook my head yes. 

" Lance," Hunk embraced me into a hug and whispered, " _I wish you did_." 


	2. Chapter 2

_It_ _was a dream. If it was why did it feel so real?_ Does Hunk wish I was gone? No, right. He's my best friend. He was there to help me with everything I through. 

My thoughts were making it harder for me to sleep. I got up from my bed and changed. After, I went to the training deck.   
Keith was already here. Either way, Keith shouldn't have to train, he's already the best at 'hand-to-hand' combat. Me, on the other hand, I can't fight for shit.   
I practised until I got tired and I went back into my room. I was finally able to fall asleep. I was maybe asleep for 5 minutes top, and an alarm went off.

Alura's voiced boomed into my room. "This is not a drill. Garla is attacking. Paladins to their lions, now. GO! GO! GO!"   
I rushed to my lion. Shiro started talking about the plans.

"Lance and Hunk, you attack the far east. Keith, you distract the Garla near the ion cannon. Pidge you go for the ion cannon since you have the invisibility coat. And I'll go with Pidge and attack Garla near you."

"Hey, Shiro. Shouldn't Hunk attack the ion cannon. His armour can give more damage onto the cannon than any of us combined."

"Lance, we don't have any time to change the plan. So no." 

"Oh yeah, okay I get it."   
We all went on our way. 

"Hunk, I have an idea," I said.

"Is it as good as the idea where you made us stay the family weekend?" He responded back with a bit of annoyance in his voice.

"That hurts, but no it's beneficial. We need to attack the ion cannon before it's charged up. Here's the plan; I'll go and distract the Galra that's closest to the cannon. While you go and hit the cannon. The others are still with their parts, so it's easier for us to end it now. Are you down for it?" 

"Yeah sure, if it helps. On the count of three?" 

"Yes. 1... 2... 3... Go Hunk." We left our assigned posts and went to the ion cannon. 

"Hunk, Lance what the fuck are you doing? You guys are-" I muted Shiro.   
Hunk got the ion cannon down in two shots.

"Guys I need help here," no one responded to me, "Guys are you there?" No responses, just cold stares.

_Why would you do that Lance_?

Why couldn't I see anything?

_Look at everyone, they're all dead now. They're dead because of you. Because you didn't want to listen to Shiro._

No, they can't be. I just saw them heading back to the castle. Stop it. Leave me alone. Why can't I move? I tried to yell but nothing come out. There was a cold surface in front of me. I started to bang it. I banged on it until it released me. My eyes finally opened as I started to fall into someone's arms. Before I hit them, everyone called out my name. I think it was me who they called out to. 


	3. Chapter 3

"Lance, why won't he wake up?" 

"It seems like he's in shocked, I think he's having a nightmare." 

There were people talking loudly. I think it's Hunk who's talking. He knows that I can't come back fast enough. Wait- So Hunk is ok what about everyone else? 

"Hunk,"

"Yes, Shiro." 

2 out of 5. 

"You knew Lance longer than everyone in this room-

"Hey!" I think Pidge cut him off. 

"Pidge, they knew each other before the Garrison. Hunk is there anything that might have helped Lance to get out of this state?" 

3 out of 5. Hunk, I love you but please don't tell them. 

"Well," he started, "It's not my place to say."  Thank you. Where's Keith? 

"Why don't we throw water on him?" 

"Because 1 that's kinda- no really fucked up and 2 it could affect him badly." 

_See, nobody died._  Why was I being paranoid?  Because if one of them died, it would have been  _your_ fault.  Shit. 

"Guys, what happened?" 

Everyone surrounded me and laughed _at me. "Why did you wake up? We would have done better without you."_  

"What?" 

"We said 'we're glad that you're okay,  **but** you need to learn how to listen. You almost cost Hunk's life let alone yours. You need to learn how to value our lives." 

"Ok I get it but the thing is that we  **won,** did we not?"

"No. You don't understand. We got it. WE HAD IT UNDER CONTROL! If we won or not didn't matter as long as we all came out alive and not dead because of your intolerance to heed instructions!"

"Stop yelling at me. No, you didn't have it under control. If you did we wouldn't be having this argument right now!"

"Sometimes I _wonder_ if we had a different blue paladin it would have been the same," he stopped talking. Everyone looked back at me. ,

Hunk was the only one who spoke out, "Shiro, was that really necessary?" 

"I wonder that too, Shiro. I wondered if I was supposed to be here or what."  

"Lance, I didn't mean it. Lance where are you going. Lance, I'm sorry." He starts to follow me back into my room. 

"Shiro, it's ok. I'm actually pretty tired." 

"Pidge said you shouldn't sleep. You might have a concussion." 

"Don't worry. I wasn't planning on sleeping." 

"Ok well, Lance I'm sorry about what I said." 

"Yea don't worry about it." He left now. 

 Don't fall asleep. Don't fall asleep.  _Why should you even listen to him? He yelled at you. Made you feel small, insignificant. Didn't even thank you for what you did for them. You help them defeat the Garla and all you got was a lecture. Why don't you leave them?_ Someone was knocking on the door. 

"Lance my boy I- were you crying?" 

"Oh, this? No, I was just yawning don't worry Coran." 

"I just came to check on you. Do you need anything?" 

"Um no. Wait, yes. Can you come in?" He walks in. " What do you need?" I hug him. 

"Gracias, papá. Para todo." 

"Lance you're not ok. What's wrong?"

"I feel useless to the team. Like a disappointment. 'You guys would do better without me' type of feeling."

" _Lance, we would be better off without you."_  


	4. Chapter 4

"I feel useless to the team. Like a disappointment. 'You guys would do better without me' type of feeling."

" _Lance, we would be better off without you."_  

Why?

"Wait, Coran can you repeat that." 

"Oh, yeah sure. I said 'we won't be able to do anything without you. You lighten up the mood when there is something serious yet you can be serious yourself. Your traits are something I wish Allura and the head lion would have.' You have bright ideas, my boy. They're going to take you places."

"Thanks, Coran. Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Yea what?"

"What languages do you know that might be useful if the garla takes over another planet?"

"I would probably say all of them. Would you like me to teach you the ones I know?"

"Yes. Let's go back to the team." 

 

A conversation was coming from the kitchen.  

"Lance, I don't think you should listen in. That's rude." 

"You're right Coran."

As soon as I heard my name, I started walking near the door so I could listen. 

"Lance? He is not bad. You guys know that."

"We know that, but the things he does sometimes, it makes me wonder if he is really right for this role." 

"We're not able to put up signs 'Need a new blue paladin. The old one was too incompetent for us.'?" 

"No. One: you guys shouldn't be thinking like that,  _especially_ you Shiro. Aren't you the one who believes in 'Patience is key' or some shit? His ideas saved half of us every mission. If you give him time to improve, he'll improve. I _know_ that." 

"Well if you know that, I'm not doubting you  _but_ he needs to improve. When he does that, I will give him time to talk about his plans ahead of time." 

 

"Lance my boy, don't go in there."

 

"You're lying, Shiro! You don't believe Hunk, nor do you believe that I can improve." 

"Lance, calm down. You're getting words out of context." 

"Don't you tell me to 'calm down'. I'm sick and tired of most of my teammates underestimate my capabilities as a teammate and as a  _person._ I got that growing up and in the Garrison. I don't want to live in that environment anymore. You believe in me or don't?" 

"I believe in you, not your ideas or your abilities to come up with good ideas where no one gets hurt." 

"My plans make sure  _you guys_ don't get hurt. I can care less about my safety. If something happens to you on these missions we do... and I can't help from stopping it... You guys are the closest thing to a family, to _my real family._ I lost one already, I don't want to lose another." They all looked at me. "Say something! Anything! Please..." 

"Lance, we won't leave you. You never lost one. We're here to protect them, so one day you can go back to them. In order for you to go back safely, Lance you need to pick up your game. Okay?"

"Yea, I guess that's right Shiro." 

"Now tell me some of your plans."

\------------------------------------

Shiro, why are you gone? Why did you lie to me? 

I promise you, Shiro. I'll be the one to bring you back. 


End file.
